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07-Jan-2020 02:32 by 8 Comments

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Emotional purity Biblical courtship = Godly marriage. You can do everything “right” and your life can still go wrong. People who follow the courtship formula still get divorced. However, what is encouraging is that most of us have determined to stop the insanity. These teachings have deep, rotten roots, and it takes time to pull them all out. They deceive us into thinking that living by formulas is “safe.” 1 1= 2. It’s nice to know I’m not alone in my dysfunction, but it is discouraging as well.

You can do everything “wrong” and still be blessed. We will not be passing on these things to the next generation. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. I leave you with the words of a very wise man:“To love at all is to be vulnerable.Harris even went so far as to say that each of those former flames actually have some sort of hold on you. My third child doesn’t have less of my heart just because I’ve loved two other children before him. It is ridiculous to suggest that there is not enough of my heart to go around. This has got to be the most bogus and the most damaging teaching of this entire movement. And, really, I haven’t given them “pieces” of my heart. The miracle of love is that it multiplies by being given. And what view of redemption does this teaching proclaim? The go-to local matchmaker hosts regular Lock and Key parties that offer a space for matching that is as straightforward as it is creative.

Upon arrival, women attendees get padlocks and men get keys.

Thus began a journey to know God and understand life; a journey from bondage to grace; a journey she's still making.

At age 17 she fell in love with her best friend and her perfect little formulated world came crashing down.

All articles on this site reflect the views of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of other Recovering Grace contributors or the leadership of the site.

Two weeks after the publication of this article, Darcy wrote some follow-up thoughts. EDITOR NOTE: If you are a reader who is unfamiliar with the specific courtship teachings of Bill Gothard and IBLP (the perspective from which Darcy writes), you can find more articles by clicking here.

She was homeschooled her whole life, raised in a cultic church and with the principles taught by Bill Gothard and IBLP.

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